Caution Isn’t Fear: A Message Men Need to Hear

In a powerful and thought-provoking speech at the Memphis Men Rising event in Memphis, Alexis Scales (NAACP Youth Council) speaks directly to the role Black men accountability plays in shaping the lives of Black girls. Through personal reflection, research, and community insight, Scales explains how many Black girls are raised in survival mode—learning caution early not because men are inherently dangerous, but because safety has often been uncertain. These lessons, rooted in love and protection, can quietly turn into fear if they are never questioned.

Scales is intentional about making one thing clear: this is not an attack on men. Many Black women are raised, protected, and guided by good men. However, good intentions alone are not always enough. Without accountability, patterns of behavior and perception can still affect how young girls learn to navigate trust, safety, and relationships. This is why conversations about protecting Black girls must go beyond warning them about the world and include how men show up in it.

Referencing research on the adultification of Black girls, Scales highlights how young Black girls are often perceived as older, less innocent, and more responsible than their peers. These perceptions lead to harsher expectations and less protection—conditions that follow girls into adulthood. She also emphasizes the importance of emotional intelligence in men, noting that emotional awareness, accountability, and regulation are essential for building healthy relationships and strong communities.

Much of Scales’ message is a call for healthy masculinity—one that understands protection does not mean control and leadership does not mean dominance. True protection shows up through presence, consistency, and the willingness to have difficult but necessary conversations. Men who lead with emotional intelligence create environments where women and girls can feel safe, respected, and heard.

Ultimately, Alexis Scales frames this conversation as a matter of Black community leadership. When men grow in accountability and emotional awareness, everyone benefits. Strong men don’t just protect individuals—they help communities thrive. As Scales reminds us, when men grow, the entire community grows with them.